Loading up the truck and heading out

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Kashrut: The Battle, The Decision

I consider myself a religious Jew but I don't keep kosher. Now, there is a contradiction that I can no longer live with. I have attempted to keep kosher in the past - more than a few times - but failed each time. I think that I was trying to just jump in all at once (and without much help) which made it difficult to succeed in my goal of becoming kosher. So, I have gone on a search for some simple steps to get me started in the right direction. I came across this the other day and I think it will help me on my path to becoming kosher.

The decision
The author suggests that this is the point where one will commit to experimenting with kashrut or committing oneself to eventually keeping a kosher home. This is a decision that has been long in the making and one that I cannot take lightly. I have experimented with keeping kosher in the past and this time I need to commit to keeping a kosher home.

Getting your big toe wet
The author suggests eliminating non-kosher items from the diet and purchasing on kosher products. Okay, by this stage, I would think this would be fairly simple (except for maybe the meat and seafood). Once I get to this stage, I will need to again talk to the rabbi about how to proceed and make sure that I am following halachah.

Wading in
The author suggests familiarizing yourself with the local kosher butcher, the kosher meat section of the grocery store, and the local kosher bakery and elimiate non-kosher meat and seafood from the diet. We have no local kosher butcher or bakery and only one or two grocery stores that (might) carry kosher meat. Through my shul [synagogue], we can purchase meat from a kosher butcher and have it delivered on a monthly basis to the shul for pickup. This is very expensive though so I am not sure what to do when I get to this stage. I may have to become vegetarian and learn to like (or at least tolerate) many of the foods that I currently dislike. We have no kosher bakery so anything that would come from a bakery would be out. I would need to bake my own items or go without. I only eat permitted seafood and I will need to do research on where to get kosher fish (other than canned tuna).

Letting go
The author suggests stop eating meat and dairy together, begin waiting an hour or two after eating meat to eat dairy, and purchase more kosher items. Okay, this is where it gets sticky for me. I do not eat red meat but I do eat chicken and turkey. Now, according to rabbinic law, fowl is considered meat and I cannot eat a chicken sandwich with a glass of milk. Unfortunately, I do not like enough varied food items to become a vegetarian so I will need to really work on this issue. Once I got this down, I think waiting an hour or two between meat and dairy will not be such a great leap. As far as the kosher items, I would hope that by this point, I will only be purchasing kosher items.

Swim like a fish
The author suggests only buying kosher food, not eating at any non-kosher restaurants, and consider kashering the kitchen. I try to buy only kosher foods but I must admit that there are some foods (especially popcorn) that I buy that are not kosher simply because I like them. However, I do feel a twinge of guilt when I see kosher popcorn on the shelf but I choose the non-kosher item. So, I guess I need to make sure that I begin choosing only kosher items. As far as restaurants go, there is only one kosher restaurant in my area and it is about 25 minutes away so I do not go there. I do sometimes eat pizza or subs from non-kosher restaurants however - but this is becoming rare in my life. When I completely get to this stage, I will need to cut out the non-kosher restaurants. As far as kashering the kitchen, that will be a bit more difficult. I live with non-Jews so I will need to make my own little "kitchenette" by using a new microwave and/or double-wrapping my food to be used in the oven. This is something I will need to talk to my rabbi about because it is a bit more complicated.

Ready to Kasher your home?
The author suggests talking to a rabbi or friends who keep kosher. I will be making plans to speak with some friends who began keeping kosher in adulthood. I think that talking to them will help me learn about the process on a practical and emotional level. After I talk to them, I can go to the rabbi to further discuss the issue and to learn the rules and get a list of what needs to be done in order to make my home kosher.

Holidays in a "Christian Nation"

For those of us who are non-Christians, there are times during the year when it becomes very apparent that we are not part of the dominant people in the Christian-dominated nation. This is especially true around certain holidays. I do not care if people celebrate the Christian holidays and I understand that I live in a Christian-dominated society. I am part of a minority. In fact, I specifically chose to part of a minority. When someone wishes me a "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Easter", I do not take offense. I just wish them a good holiday and go on with my life.

Now, these holidays can pose problems for me. As a convert, I am reminded every year that I am no longer allowed to participate in these Christian holiday celebrations (no matter how "secular" they have become) with my family, friends, or co-workers. Some of them have a difficult time understanding why I will not celebrate certain holidays because they are "secular". I usually just say that I am not interested and most of them will accept that reason. Others though are a little more "forceful" and I explain to them that my religious beliefs forbid me from participating in non-Jewish religious holidays no matter how secular the holidays appear.

Generally, this does not pose a problem for me at work but I do sometimes get upset that I must take off their religious holidays and I need to use vacation time to celebrate my own religious holidays. Again, I understand that until (G-d willing) I make aliyah [move to Israel], I live in a Christian-dominated society. I make due with the hand I have been dealt and the choice that I have made to place myself outside of the dominant society.

What's in a name?

So, what is in a name?

I have been called a religious Jew, a Conservative Jew, an Ashkenazi [European] Jew - while these may all be true, I do not categorize myself with just these labels. I have been thinking about self-definition quite a bit lately. For me as a Jew by Choice, I have more freedom defining who I am in the Jewish world than many of those who were born Jews. Yes, I consider myself a religious Jew, a Conservative Jew, an Ashkenazi Jew - but mostly, I would consider myself a Masorti Jew.

So, what do you ask is the difference between a Conservative Jew and a Masorti Jew? Well, it is true that they are often placed under the same umbrella - Conservative in America and Canada and Masorti everywhere else, I do see some differences. A few examples: 1) Masorti do not permit driving on Shabbat [Jewish Sabbath] or Yomim Tovim [religious holidays]; 2) does not permit (or at least frowns upon) using electricity on Shabbat; 3) does not permit openly gay/lesbian students to be ordained as rabbis or cantors; and 4) does not permit "commitment ceremonies" for gay/lesbian Jews.

Masorti means "traditional" and this is how I self-define as a Jew. I have a lot of misgivings about the Conservative movement and how far to the left it has slid in the last 10+ years. I find the weakening of halachick [Jewish legal] decisions and religious commitment to be bothersome and - frankly - anti-Jewish. I define myself as a Jew who is committed to halachah and Torah and to religious commitment. If I define myself as such a Jew then I can only categorize myself as Masorti since Conservative (in my opinion) really only means a movement that is only slightly right of the Reform movement and quickly sliding away from Torah and halachah.

I do not mean to belittle Conservative Jews (or any Jews for that matter) but I am reaching a point in my spiritual quest as a Jew by Choice where I must take a stand and define who I am and how I relate to Torah, G-d, and my fellow Jews. For me, this stand starts with self-definition and that definition is as a Masorti Jew.

Culture and Ethnicity

I am sorry that I have not updated the blog in the last few weeks. I have a lot on my plate right now so I just wanted to leave you with an essay that I wrote for my conversion classes with my rabbi.

The Role of Culture and Ethnicity in Judaism

The pursuit of knowledge for its own sake, an almost fanatical love of justice, and the desire for personal independence - these are the features of Jewish tradition that make me thank my stars that I belong to it. ---Albert Einstein

Judaism is not only a religion it is a total way of life. Ethnicity and culture are important parts of Judaism. Culture and ethnicity are both expressed through such mean as art, food, literature, music, entertainment, language, family, community, and the struggle for social justice. Ethnicity is defined as being part of a "group of people recognized as a class on the basis of certain distinctive characteristics, such as religion, language, ancestry, culture, or national origin. (The American Heritage Dictionary, 1983 p. 242) One of the defining characteristics of Jewish ethnicity is the Jewish religion. Judaism was the first well-known, worldwide monotheistic faith. The Jewish religion is recognized worldwide as a distinctive characteristic of the particular ethnic group known as Jewish. The language(s) of Judaism are also a particular aspect of Jewish ethnicity. Hebrew, the religious and vernacular, is the language of Judaism. There is also Yiddish that, while not as widespread among Jews, has also become identified with Judaism the same as Hebrew has over the centuries. The ancestry of the Jewish people goes back thousands of years to the patriarchs and matriarchs. In addition to this the birth of a child to a Jewish mother perpetuates the ancestry of the Jewish people since that child is Jewish. While Jews have been spread out throughout the world there has always been a connection to the land of Israel. This connection has only grown stronger in the last fifty years with the establishment of the State of Israel. Ethnicity is inextricably linked to culture.

Culture is defined as “the arts, beliefs, customs, institutions, and all other products of human work and thought created by a people or group at a particular time.” (The American Heritage Dictionary, 1983 p. 169) The arts and entertainment arenas have been home to many Jews. There has not been much argument about what constitutes Jewish entertainment but what constitutes Jewish art has been less than universally accepted. One of the unique aspects of Jewish art is how the Law affects what can and cannot be used in art. For example, Jews are not allowed to represent G-d in any form of art. There are also other Laws, such as those regarding the use of the sun and moon in art, which affect what (religious) Jews are permitted to use in their art. This shows how Jewish ethnicity (religion) affects and interacts with Jewish culture. Judaism is no different from other cultures in that it has its own unique beliefs. These beliefs in Judaism range from the religious to the superstitious—from monotheism to the story of Lillith. There are customs that are unique to Judaism such as eating latkes on Chanukah and tri-cornered pastries on Purim. There are also customs that, while not unique to Judaism, are found throughout Judaism. One of these customs is the fight for civil rights and social justice. Judaism does have its unique institutions. Some of these are the synagogue, the Temple, yeshivas, and the Jewish Community Center.

While there are plenty of similarities between Jews regarding their ethnicity and culture it must be kept in mind that there are also many varying degrees within Judaism. There are differences between Sephardim and Ashkenazim; between Israeli Jews and American Jews; between Orthodox, Conservative, Reconstructionist, and Reform movements; and, of course between each individual Jew.

© Rachel-Esther bat Avraham 2003-2008

Happy Purim

Happy Purim!!

As a Yid By Choice, I find the story of Purim to be fascinating and a story for the converts. We as converts have joyfully thrown our lots (purim) in with the Jewish people. My rabbi asked me at least twice (while I was in the process of converting) if I fully understood that the Jews are a hated people and that I will too be hated just because I am a Jew. I was also asked this by the bet din [rabbinical court]. I affirmed that I understood this very serious issue and I have thought long and hard about it before I ever considered conversion.

We as Jews are commanded to thoroughly destroy Amalek and his descendants (physical and spiritual). Haman was a descendant of Amalek and he tried to destroy the Jewish people. Mordechai and Esther stood up to Haman and saved the Jews. As a convert, I have thought long and hard about what it means to be a part of the Jewish people and how that affects my outlook on life. I realize that I am now commanded to destroy Amalek and I see his descendants in many places - both near and far - trying to destroy my people. I take the command seriously and I pray to HaShem that we will triumph with His help over the evil Amalek.

Please teach me!

I have been reading The Conservative Movement in Judaism: Dilemmas and Opportunities which has opened up a world to me that I did not really understand about Conservative Judaism. I have read one-half of the book so far and it seems that the overall theme is a we-them dichotomy within Conservative Judaism. The book talks quite a bit about the "masses" and the "elite". The "masses" are the common everyday laypeople and the "elite" are not only the rabbis, chazanim [cantors], and teachers - but also other leaders and learned members.

As a Jew by Choice, I obviously do not fit in with the "elite" and I in some ways do not fit in with the "masses". I am struggling to become a learned member of the Jewish faith but it is a struggle when this dichotomy exists. The "masses" are - and this is a very broad, general statement - not very learned and many follow very few (if any) mitzvot [commandments]. This means that there are many connected to the shul [synagogue] who are not able/willing to assist me in becoming more religious (or even helping me with Hebrew or proper holiday/shabbat observance). The shul that I attend does not have a chazzan and only has one rabbi. This means that the rabbi is very busy and not always available to assist me. I am a shy person so just trying to get to know any of the "elite" is a struggle for me. I feel less-than because I was not born a Jew and because I am not nearly as learned as I should (or that I feel I should) be seven years after my conversion.

It is impossible to learn on one's own. At some point one must, as R' Yahoshua ben Perachyah said, "Provide yourself with a teacher, get yourself a colleague, and judge all men favorably." (Pirkei Avot 1:6) I have trouble finding a teacher or a colleague but I am determined to break through my shyness and find a teacher. I cannot begin to delve into the teachings of Hebrew, Torah, and Talmud by myself. I have already contacted someone about assisting me in finding a Hebrew teacher and I have signed up for a two-hour class at my shul that will teach about the aliyot [being called up to bless/read from the Torah], dressing the Torah, and hagbah [lifting the Torah]. I can only hope that this class will help me learn and make me feel more comfortable in shul.